Mastering the art of saying “No” is compulsory in many cases. We do have to learn how to say it without offending the other person and still getting what we want. Appropriately saying “No” can really save our butt from a tricky situation and that’s why mastering our “No”‘s is so important.
And still, the real power lies not in saying “No”, but in saying “Yes”. If mastering the “No”‘s will activate an invisible safety belt, a good, plain and timely “Yes” will push us higher than we think we can. If “No” is the savior, “Yes” is the creator. “No” is defensive, “Yes” is empowering.
Let’s try to understand the art of acknowledging, by reviewing 14 ways to say yes:
1. I Do!
If you ever asked somebody to marry you, than you know what I mean: “I do” is a very interesting form of total submission and commitment. You say “I do” with almost your last breathe, still thinking the other person would never ask. You are almost shouting, raising your voice in an effort of being heard and accepted. Can you hear me? I’m here! I do!
2. Let’s Do It!
The practical approach of starting stuff together. You use “Let’s do it” when you’re eager to start, have almost everything it takes, the only extra piece being saying it out loud so the other part can hear it. “Let’s do it” is the ultimate involvement answer, it’s so enabling that it barely qualify for a plain “Yes”, it’s more of an informal affiliation statement:.
3. What Are We Waiting For?
The standard “Yes” of the impatient (and maybe of the compulsive one, but I’m not quite sure about that). This answer literally bury the question and move the focus on the physical action. If you get this type of “Yes” it means the question was superfluous. Instead, you should just move on and start doing things.
4. Hell, Yes
Enthusiastic and passionate, this answer always reminds me of a long dusty road in the desert and a nice bike under the rider. It’s the ultimate expression of freedom, of leaving behind the old version of you and starting over. Every time I hear this answer, I know something fundamentally new will happen.
5. I’m In It
Business-like expression of a partnership. This “Yes” is wearing a suit and it’s quite disciplined. If your question involves some long term plan, receiving this “Yes” could be a very good sign. It shows commitment and strictness. The tricky part is that the other person is looking forward for the same things in you, so be careful.
6. I Was Born For It
“I’m waiting for this question since I was born, dude. Of course, it’s yes. How can it be the other way around?” This “Yes” is always making me smile. Makes me actually visualize the whole process: well, I think I would like to be born for…. that thing! Can we do it? Please? Wow, great, now let’s find some guys to spread the word about it.
7. Of Course
Chilling and kinda polite. This “Yes” goes well with a cup of the and some biscuits. Maybe a little break in the afternoon, around five o’clock, but let’s not push it. Whenever I hear this “Yes” I’m also prepared to hear a “but”. I think this “Yes” is the most “but”-prone from all. Nevertheless, hearing it makes me feel like I’m having some very important negotiation.
8. My Thoughts Exactly
Confirming and validating, this “Yes” is almost a confession. It’s so powerful that I’m sometimes afraid I actually penetrated into the other guy’s mind. I mean, are those really his thoughts? Wow. Whenever I use it, I do it because I really trust the other person or I try to build a more intimate connection. Which is always happening after this type of “Yes”.
9. Are We There Yet?
And that would be actually the “Yes” of the compulsive. I admit I get the shivers when I hear it, although I do know it’s funny. But the confirmation level is so high and the triggered energy seems so available, that I’m almost feeling guilty for not going “there” yet. I also think this is the more validating “Yes” from all.
10. You’ll Lead, I’ll Follow
Any “Yes” expressed in this form will show total trust and confidence from the other part. When it does not show a fine sense of irony too, of course. It’s the most uncertain “Yes” from all. If I hear this, I know that although I’m getting followed, I somehow keep all the responsibility. This “Yes” comes with a little bit of extra caution.
11. Aye, Aye, Sir!
Military-like acceptance. You can’t mistake this one as a disguised “No”, in my opinion. I almost always respond to this “Yes” with a relieving “Dismissed!”, just for the fun of it. And every time I hear it, I’m compelled to continue the discussion in short but strong sentences, also know as orders. The nice thing with orders is that you expect them to be followed, most of the time.
12. Undoubtedly
In case you’re having any doubt, I mean. If you’re hearing this, you’re taking off the veil from a possibly foggy situation and acknowledge total confidence. This “Yes” is coming with the sound of a hammer hitting a nail right in the head. If you know what I mean. I think this “Yes” is the most relieving of all.
13. Always!
You know I do, why are you still asking? It’s also a form of past, present and future commitment. If you hear this, your next question may not be necessary at all. This “Yes” is more than often the beginning of a beautiful friendship.
14. Totally!
Unreserved immersion and acceptance. That “yes” is my favorite, but if you ask me why, I’m not sure I know the answer. Maybe because I am that kind of guy: if I’m in it for something, I simply don’t know the meaning of half, I do it all the way up to the end.
***
What’s your preferred way to say “Yes”? Doesn’t necessarily have to be from the list above, surprise me :-). When do you say it? To whom do you say it? Leave a comment and let me know, I’m really curious.
And if you wonder why I chose exactly 14 ways to say “Yes”, well, it’s because I think for every “No” in our lives we should be able to come up with at least two “Yes”. 🙂
Liked this post? Then try out one of the most popular audio posts on my blog too. Click the “play” button below for a short excerpt:
[sc_embed_player fileurl=”http://dragosroua.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/33-ways-motivation-excerpt.mp3″]
You can get that entire blog post in audio format right now, for only $2.99 (or more, if you feel generous 🙂 ). Just make your choice below:.
would have to include “naturally” or “yes siree” personally speaking!
DAMN STRAIGHT!!!!
hey! i like all of these.
two more:
go on then!
by all means!
One from me: why not?
“You bet, BIATCHES!!!!” <- my recent favorite 🙂
I always say “OK” or “sure”. Pretty noncommittal and dispassionate almost as if I am being forced to do something. And then, I wow everyone with what I do.
Underpromising and overdelivering, all day, everyday!
I always say “OK” or “sure”. Pretty noncommittal and dispassionate almost as if I am being forced to do something. And then, I wow everyone with what I do.
Underpromising and overdelivery, all day, everyday!
I’ve never really thought of myself as a Yes girl, so this list is definitely different for me. Thanks for sharing. I’ll add a few more yeses to my life.
.-= Nea | Self Improvement Saga´s last blog ..Peer Pressure and Conformity: Do You Fear Standing Out from the Crowd? =-.
I like the Yes..“let’s do it†..it establishes that sense of togetherness 🙂
.-= Fatima Da´s last blog ..Perseverance is Hard-Tips to develop this virtue =-.
SIMPLY BRILLIANT! I love this list, my fave is #12 Undoubtedly. I think its my fave because it is similar to the type of “yes” I use the most, which is “absolutely”. I tend to say this when I want to assure a person that I really mean my yes. I also use this yes as a way of making someone feel glad that they asked the question. I teach at a college and I find I use this yes a lot during class.
.-= Carol King´s last blog ..Reading Law of Attraction Articles Is Like Watching Paint Dry =-.
Hi Dragos, my favorite way of saying yes is “I’m in!”. I leave out the “it”. I also use the “What are we waiting for?” a lot.
I’m really loving your blog lately. It’s obvious you are putting a lot of effort into it. Great job!
.-= Stephen – Rat Race Trap´s last blog ..12 Questions You Should Be Asking Yourself =-.
🙂 (didn’t find the smiley for a nod 😉 )
Thanks Dragos. This was an encouraging post. Some other ways of saying yes that I can think of is, “Let’s go!” “Okay!” “Sure!” The occasional smile and enthusiastic nod also works too. 🙂
.-= Hulbert´s last blog ..13 Reasons to Stop Complaining =-.
I’ll go with: Absolutely, I’d love to, and my pleasure. I like these three because they each add a slightly different feeling to my yes. Absolutely is strongly affirmative. I’d love to shows I have personal interest. And My pleasure tells the other person that I appreciate them.
I especially like the last one: my pleasure, it really feels nice to say it. I’d love to, is another favorite of mine too 🙂
I’m more of an “Absolutely!” kind of guy. Of course is one I use a lot as well.
.-= Mike King´s last blog ..Action Creates Change =-.
Just remembered I use “absolutely” a lot. Guess it doesn’t really leave room for interpretations 🙂
Me and my desk-mates in school (three awesome dudes) have a kind of crew, consisting of us four and our aluminum foil ball (call Rezsi Retinho:D).. we call ourselves The Horde, and so on, and so on.. we have all the habits and traditions that high school guy crews have.. one of those habits is saying: “OH YEAH!”, with a tone that demands to be written with capitals.
OH YEAH!
OH YEAH!
OH YEAH!
Those capitals are making all the difference here 🙂
My favorite is “As you wish.”
.-= McLaughlin´s last blog ..Wear sunscreen =-.
Can’t be dangerous at times but I know some cases (and some persons) in which I would like this answer instead of a plain “Yes” 😉
Several others we tend to use – “yes, please” is always a good one, if, say, someone’s offering to make you a cup of tea. “OK!” is common from my 4 year old (-:
Can’t believe I overlooked “OK”. Guess I don’t have the mindset of a 4 year old anymore. And that’s a shame 🙂
I think there’s a lot to be learned from your average 4 year old – and boundless enthusiasm is definitely one of them (-:
I think a lot of it is culture dependent, though. I take “of course” as being very positive and affirming, while some of the others seem too emphatic for my taste. But then I’m English (-:
Ok Dragos, You do come up with the most awesome posts!
That being said….I usually say yes in a loud ‘OFCOURSE…Lets do it’….then there is the classic ‘Yeah Yeah YEah’…the amount of YEAHs and the tune depend on my level of excitement for the venture ahead 😉
Z~
.-= Zeenat{Positive Provocations}´s last blog ..Recurring Patterns =-.
So, you’re the “let’s do it” kind of person too. I thought so 😉
Great post 🙂
Absolutely!
butofcors 🙂
After typing “a better life” and I want to say-Totally!
.-= Lana – DreamFollowers Blog´s last blog ..My 2010 Goals and 2 Awesome Techniques I Used to Set Them. =-.
Yeah, that captcha is a little tricky but I like what it does, so far. 🙂
On my old cell phone, I used to have the message, “Oh yeah, Baby!!”
Does that work?
.-= LisaNewton´s last blog ..Under your souls on 3rd Street in downtown Los Angeles =-.
And what happened to the message on the new cell phone?
I guess I really have no choice right now but to say HELL YEAH!
.-= Steven Handel | The Emotion Machine´s last blog ..How To Think Less And Do More: Turning Life Into Flow =-.
You always have a choice, but I like the way you faked you don’t 😉
If you’re trying to fill our minds with a million words for Yes so that it’s harder for us to say No to things in our lives then I love your thinking!
How about, “Does a bear shit in the woods?” 😀
.-= Ian Nuttall´s last blog ..How to Make More Time For Achieving Your Goals =-.
Basically, you got the idea, that’s my plan. Then, conquering the word, of course.
As for the bears, what can I say more 🙂 🙂
Shit Yeah! (or, if my son is around, Shoot Yeah!)
The catch is, that in order to convey just how emphatic my Yes is, the two words are almost one, sounding more like: Shitchea!
My other faves are: It’s ON, or BRING IT.
🙂
.-= Lisis´s last blog ..Growing Up Gay in the Bible Belt =-.
That “shoot yeah” sounds really energizing to me. And I bet the real, linked sound of the two words is even more powerful. 🙂
“Can I say yes?!” In some “too good to be true” circumstances, that’s my way of saying–how the hell could I pass this up?!
I really love this article and, as someone with an entrepreneurial spirit, I’m very glad I “stumbled upon” your site. I’ll be tuning in lots in the future!!!
That was fun, can I say “I liked it?”. I like those situations in which we are asking for permission even if we don’t, actually 🙂
I’m second nature to ‘totally’, it flies out of my mouth an a regular basis. As you stated though, not sure why…it just sort of comes out. Perhaps becasue I am open minded to just about anything so I rarely feel a reason to hesitate on much of what I do or come across in life.
‘Do’ or ‘Do Not’ – There is no inbetween. So why not ‘totally’? – i say 🙂
Yeap, I like “totally” too, and you’re spot on: there is no inbetween 😉 You’re either are who you want to be, wither not.
“Count me in” is something I use when its a collaborative effort. But the the one I use most often is: What are we waiting for. My career is volunteering in the Non-Profit Sector and sometimes I go crazy waiting for someone to just flippin’ start a project. I like it when I get to be in charge. Then I use ” Okay, who wants to do what”
If its an invitation to me as an individual or if I am the one to start the project and I get the go ahead from a BOD then “Hell yes” is what I use.
I just started two “Hell Yes!” Projects. One with Tim Brownson from “Discomfort Zone”. He started a BEHAG (big hairy audacious goal) with his new book he co-authored: How to Be Rich and Happy.
The second is with a foundation called Innovative Communities. I’m starting a housing project for young adults with disabilities.
And yes these are shameless plugs but Hell Yes!
.-= Maureen´s last blog .. =-.
Big fan of BHAG myself and I know about Tim’s idea, wishing you all the luck to make it happen 🙂 And I don’t have ANYTHING against shameless self-promotion 🙂
I was thinking about adding “yep” – for me, it’s a dry acceptance of a reality that’s not necessarily according to our hopes/beliefs/ideas, but it’s there, and it’s powerful and we have to accept and integrate it to our system one way or another. It’s not necessarily a “bad” kind of yes, but rather a neutral-on-the-way-to-positive one 🙂
.-= Raluca´s last blog ..Nu, curiozitatea nu omoara pe nimeni 🙂 =-.
I like the neutral-on-the-positive approach. Especially the “on-the-positive” side of it 🙂
I think i’m a “lets do it” kind of guy. I find myself constantly saying that. That being said, I probably also need to learn to say no sometimes as I take on too many things which I have to push aside for later.
Nice to hear about another “let’s do it” kind of guy. Join the club 🙂
Nice, I like this list as I’m trying to be the YES man for the next 2 weeks 🙂
.-= Oscar – freestyle mind´s last blog ..Interview with Colin Wright of Exile Lifestyle =-.
So, should I take the “Nice” in the front of your comment as your preferred way to say “yes”? 🙂